Thoughts on life and ministry

My pastor here in Orlando told this great story yesterday. We were sitting at the beach for a beach baptism (81 people baptized!) and so we're all sprawled out on blankets, beach chairs and towels. He starts to say that he was just at New Smyrna Beach over spring break with his wife and three kids, and he took them out to a restaurant. When the waitress came and brought their food, he asked for the check and take out boxes as well. Pastor Isaac looks says to his wife, have you noticed that I've been doing that a lot lately? Asking for the check and boxes at restaurants? And she says, "Yes, I have noticed that." And he says, not only at restaurants, but when we were at a wedding last weekend and I was ready to go and you were talking to other people, and I just wanted to leave, I was done with the wedding. Have you noticed that?" And she said, "Yes, I have noticed that." And he continued to say, "Even at church events, when everything's kind of winding up, I just want to go and you're standing chatting with people and I just want to get out of there. Have you noticed that?" And she says, "Yes, I have noticed that."

And Pastor Isaac continues to say, "You know what I think it is? I don't want to feel trapped. I want to leave the restaurant when I want to and not wait on the waitress, and I want to leave the wedding when I want to and church. Maybe I need to go to counseling for that-- maybe something happened in my childhood that I felt trapped from and I need to work that all out."

And his wife says, "Let's save some money. I don't think you need to go to counseling. I think the counselor will tell you this: you're selfish." And of course she said it in a much nicer way, but she continued on to say, "You want things when you want them, how you want them, all for yourself-- that's called selfishness."

I share this story not to mock those in counseling because I know that there is fruitfulness and usefulness out of counseling. I share this rather to say that we think our problems are coming from all these other sources in our lives, we shift blame, when really the blame is sin. It's sin in our lives, and in the lives of those around us, and inherent in the fallen world. We can give it all these other labels, but at the end of the day it's about the sinful nature within us.

I think today I realized the fullness of this story. I like to "blame" my "personality" for a lot of the struggles I have-- I'm very introverted and don't like crowds, or I thrive in work environments with peace and quiet, or the circumstances are incredibly stressful so I have an excuse to feel frustrated the way I do. All these things may be true but at the root of it all is that we have a broken relationship with God that can only be reconciled by Jesus Christ. And therefore it is CHRIST we must cling to in the midst of crises, whether they are circumstantial, relational, familial, or due to personality. It is Christ who we must cling to.